chocolatecrest

Fancy fast food. Fancy food courts. Fancy water bottles. Just when we thought all staples of our basic Americana couldn't get any bougier, Crest whips up a new line of speciality toothpastes, with flavors more reminiscent of the candy/seasonal/greeting card aisle than dental hygiene.

"Be," they're calling it, as in "Be Adventurous," "Be Dynamic," and any number of uplifting affirmations that have no business being anywhere within eyesight before you've had your second cup of coffee. The three flavors currently on the roster are "Mint Chocolate Trek," "Vanilla Mint Spark," and "Lime Spearmint Zest."

According to Procter & Gamble's press release (via ABC), "Now consumers can explore outside their boundaries, arouse their senses and energize their brushing routine like never before." Because Herbal Essences apparently doesn't cut it anymore.

New Crest "Be" Toothpaste: $4.99 a tube starting next week.

PicThx Procter & Gamble

Dominique Zamora

Dominique would be a foodie if she had money to pay for food. For now, she gets by just looking at food photography, which results in at least one more starving journalism student every time Instagram breaks down.