While many reclusive souls spent Valentine's Day with constant reminders of their loneliness, one man decided to work the system.
Maryland resident Stephen Bosner claimed to have bamboozled an entire Outback Steakhouse on the day of love.
Live Tweeting his night of deceit, Bosner started off by asking, "If I went to Outback Steakhouse by myself tonight and asked for a table for 2, then got progressively sadder as the night went on alone, do you think they’d give me my steak for free?"
if I went to Outback Steakhouse by myself tonight and asked for a table for 2, then got progressively sadder as the night went on alone, do you think they’d give me my steak for free?
— Phteven (@baconflavoring) February 14, 2019
Turns out they wouldn't, but he still found a way to con a couple into paying for his meal, and he let us into his journey, step-by-step.
The Arrival
in case you were wondering whether I’m taking this seriously...
— Phteven (@baconflavoring) February 15, 2019
y’all. i wore a suit jacket. pic.twitter.com/Xlae1xXQxi
The ruse started before he even got seated, as there was a 45 minute wait, to which he responded with a, "Oh that’s okay, this works perfectly - she said she was running a bit late anyway.”
He wore a suit, as any self-respecting man on a fake date would, was eventually seated, and even ordered his imaginary Valentine a glass of Chardonnay.
The Appetizers
finished the first loaf of bread pic.twitter.com/2BnCMMm2I4
— Phteven (@baconflavoring) February 15, 2019
While his date was "running late," he still took advantage and started off the night with Outback's famous bread loaf. Surely she wouldn't mind, and if she wants some bread on arrival, you can just order some. No harm done.
As some time passed, he ate a second loaf of bread.
Kitchen Closes Soon
“hello darkness my old friend” pic.twitter.com/2i6rQS260j
— Phteven (@baconflavoring) February 15, 2019
The Kitchen was 15 minutes from closing, so he had to eventually order something. Bosner chugged his date's glass of wine in front of the server, and ordered a steak.
Bosner said that everyone in the restaurant glanced at him at least once, as it was painfully obvious that he was having dinner alone on Valentine's Day.
The Fake Voicemail
audio of a fake voicemail I just left in earshot of anyone still at the bar pic.twitter.com/LfIttzT3u6
— Phteven (@baconflavoring) February 15, 2019
To add a little drama, and really lay it on thick, Bosner jumped on the phone and left a 40 second voicemail, saying that he hoped, "everything is OK, and nothing bad happened."
He actually recorded himself leaving this fraudulent voicemail, and spoke loud enough for anyone around him to hear.
"I Have Named Her Katherine"
Katherine is a consultant at Deloitte. She lives in Arlington, that’s why I chose this spot.
— Phteven (@baconflavoring) February 15, 2019
We met at the grocery store. We both went for the same bag of shredded cheese.
She seemed so excited for our Valentine’s Day date.
With plenty of time on his hands, Bosner finally named his fake date, and even gave her a backstory. If this is not commitment, I don't know what is. He has gone through all this trouble, and still made sure to give his non-existing date a full profile.
"Katherine is a consultant at Deloitte. She lives in Arlington, that’s why I chose this spot. We met at the grocery store. We both went for the same bag of shredded cheese. She seemed so excited for our Valentine’s Day date."
The Restaurant Is Officially Closed
10 minutes have gone by. haven’t touched the steak. the restaurant closed 25 minutes ago pic.twitter.com/rA2Ni6kaQt
— Phteven (@baconflavoring) February 15, 2019
Putting in a late order, Bosner stayed in the Outback a little after closing. While the doors were closed for 25 minutes, Bosner stared down his steak, didn't touch it, and actually began to weep.
He said he even went as far as to accidentally drop some mac & cheese on the floor, and with zero f*cks given, picked up and still ate it.
Even with this night being a pre-planned ploy, you have to think there was a bit of actual sadness on Bosner's part, because this is getting increasingly sad.
The Payoff
UPDATE: a couple at the bar paid for my meal for me.
— Phteven (@baconflavoring) February 15, 2019
this mission?
SUCCESSFUL.
There was at least one couple left at the bar, and they apparently not only bought the whole scam, but also bought him his dinner. While it wasn't Outback that paid for his meal, at least someone did.
To not be a complete dick, Stephen donated $50, which is about the price of an Outback dinner, to the American Civil Liberties Union.
Outback's Response
How about you bring in a real date and the meal’s on us? The love connection is up to you though. ♥️ Send us a DM so we can make it happen.
— Outback Steakhouse (@Outback) February 15, 2019
At the end of it all, Bosner scammed the Outback employees, the customers, got a free meal, and Outback's response was another free meal for him and a date.
You'd think Outback would be mad, but it seems they can take a joke, and the whole thing was pretty impressive anyway.
Not everyone was impressed with the joke, some even going as far as saying things like,"You think $20 is good compensation for not letting your waiter turn over his table, on a night that he's counting on to make good money? for a joke that's not particularly funny, so you can get some likes on twitter?" and, "You wasted a server's time and money plus conned a couple of people to pay you for a dinner that you didn't deserve. Some 'hero'. Get a life."
Everyone's a critic, but Stephen created a memorable night for himself, even if it was at the expense of others.
