In today's hyperbolic food news that no one will bother checking because 1) who really cares and 2) we probably have something more important to do anyway, Krispy Kreme unveiled a new champagne donut that it touts is the "most expensive" in the world.

Adorned by a gilded white chocolate lotus, festooned with edible diamonds, stuffed with Dom Pérignon champagne jelly, and sprinkled with 24 karat gold leaf, this is not what you eat out of a white cardboard box on your cheat day. This is what you break out at your high school reunion when everyone else is choking down soggy rice pilaf. This is what you show your father-in-law when he questions your ability to provide. This is what you share with your spouse on your wedding day (but not before sending a few cruel revenge selfless to your ex). Basically, if you're able to buy and eat this thing, you really have nothing better to do than be a rich, sweet-toothed prick.

Thankfully, Krispy Kreme UK created its $1685 dessert in part to raise money for The Children's Trust, a charity for children with brain injury — which helps counteract all the excess. We'll take a dozen.

H/T Maxim