Breast Milk Lollipops Exist to Make You Envy Infants

Let’s be real: after the semen cocktails, the idea of a breast milk lollipop seems downright tame. Not to mention nostalgic — after all, the last time you drank breast milk was also probably the last time you ate as much as you wanted, screamed constantly, and still had someone else wipe your butt.

Lollyphile, the company responsible for creatively flavored lollipops, has a healthy respect for the awesome power of breast milk, describing it as a substance “so delicious it could turn a screaming, furious child into a docile, contented one” and infants as “selfish” for hogging all of it. They’re also quick to reassure any dubious consumers that the lollipops are not made with actual breast milk (so no one has to worry about factories full of pregnant and nursing mothers pumping frantically to keep up with lollipop demand). Lollyphile has expressed a ton of gratitude to the mothers who shared their breast milk with Lollyphile “flavor specialists” to get the authentic breast milk flavor, but the treats themselves are totally vegan.

And no, the lollipops aren’t shaped like breasts.

Breast Milk Lollipops $10 @ Lollyphile 

H/T HuffPo

More content

Products
Kraft Mac & Cheese Is The Latest To Join The Protein Chat
Kraft is the latest to join the protein parade. The company has announced PowerMac, a new product that pumps its iconic mac and cheese with…
,
CultureProducts
Goldfish Brings Back Harry Potter Butterbeer Grahams For Butterbeer Season
Goldfish is working its magic once again. The snack brand has teamed with Warner Bros. to re-release Harry Potter-inspired Butterbeer Flavored Grahams. Arriving in time…
,
CultureProducts
Fluffy Just Launched His Own Tequila
Gabriel “Fluffy” Iglesias is entering the spirits industry with a “little fine” tequila. The legendary stand-up comic has teamed with Next Century Spirits to launch…
,
Burger
We Deliver!

Enter your email address below and we'll deliver our top stories straight to your inbox