Apparently we've been asleep on Epic Deli in Johnsburg, Illinois. They've got some pretty beastly looking sandwiches on their menu, but the one that caught our eye goes by the name, "The Deebo."
An homage to the muscular thug who made Ice Cube's life miserable in the Friday movies, this sammich is stuffed with Polish ham and American cheese. Its white bread is battered in tempura, then completely crusted with crushed Doritos and fried. With a side of ghost pepper ranch dipping sauce, this sandwich just looks and sounds like fire.
Their site has a disclaimer that the "images of Epic creations are not edible through your computer, attempting to bite your screen could cause damage(s)." Good thing I read that first, 'cause I was about to start gnawing on my laptop.