Mike Johnston, that's who.
In order to keep with their wedding anniversary tradition of 15 years, Johnston drove to the nearest KFC 435 miles away, ordered 15 buckets of chicken and drove back to his Yellowknife home in Canada, according to CBC.
Yup, the tradition started during their wedding reception 15 years ago, when the Johnstons dished out 500 pieces of KFC chicken to their friends and family, in one of the most 'Murica ways to celebrate a couple's union.
Since then, Johnston and his family have always eaten KFC, but when the nearest KFC closed down, it forced Johnston to pull an audible and take a long, long drive in order to keep the tradition alive.
As you can imagine, Mike got some weird looks when he ordered 15 grease buckets, but the KFC in High Level, Alberta complied.
The entire mission ended up costing him over $600, but you can't put a price on the wife's happiness, right?