In a perfect world, everyone brings Costco sheet cake and whiskey to parties. In reality, you usually get stale chips and another party's leftover Coors light. Hoping to improve the world of late night drunks, the people of Reddit were asked: What is the coolest thing I can take to a party to improve the night?
The answers will restore your faith in humanity. Or destroy it. Either way, you'll be upset you didn't know what a flabongo was 'til now.
Via Todd Glass: If you're going later to a party, stop by McDonald's and grab like twenty cheeseburgers. Everybody's been drinking a while, so when you show up with those delicious greaseballs, you'll be a goddamned hero.
One of those inflatable remote controlled sharks, a pie, and a box of Nerf guns. Whoever shoots down the shark gets the pie!
A goat. Totally serious.
30 clowns and some orange soda
I have hand cranked blender that is always a hit. People are blown away by the concept and they all want to try. So I put them to work making us delicious margaritas. When I'm travelling I tell them "We don't have electricity in a lot of Canada, so lots of appliances are hand-powered". They eat it up.
A breathalyzer. It's actually quite entertaining, I've played the game where the lowest score has to take a shot. Plus you also know who shouldn't drive
When I was in high school my mom would always give me a pineapple to take to parties with me. I still don't really know why, but they were always a huge hit.
I once brought a freshly filled 10 L dewar of it to a party my roommates and I were hosting because I was a moron and thought that if the ice/cold beer ran out, we could fill a garbage can with water + beers and then pour in the liquid nitrogen to very quickly cool it to a freezing cold slush.
It was about 2/3rds the size of the keg, and I had just filled it up and covered it in thermal blankets to keep that sucker cold. For reference, it took two of us to safely carry this thing from my backseat and onto the kitchen countertop.
Fast forward to mid-party, it's sitting there, a blackout-drunk moron thinks it's a keg, pops the lid and tries to pull it off the counter and to the ground to tap it, but greatly underestimates its weight. Dude's drunk legs start to wobble.
I see this and yell over "THAT'S NOT BEER!" and try to rush over from across the party. As he's struggling to hold this thing from dropping off the counter, he knocks over a massive vodka bottle which smashes to the floor and surprises him enough that he drops the dewar.
The dewar falls neck first from the countertop and is "cushioned" by a 30-rack of beer, which promptly explodes everywhere as the dewar, leaning downwards over the 30-rack, spills its contents across the kitchen floor.
Ever seen frozen alcohol? The tiled floor was covered in it. Didn't look so much like an ice rink as it did like flaky broken glass. We opened up the windows and got out of there since 10 liters of liquid nitrogen can make ~6 cubic meters of gas. When we came back in, the vodka portions had melted into a nasty slush, but there were still beer flakes absolutely everywhere.
At least the apartment felt a bit colder, though.
Did this once - Totally worth it, everyone usually loves it.
Go buy a cheap cooler.
Buy a bunch of fruit (i.e strawberries, grapes, pineapple, watermelon, etc).
Cut up into decent sized pieces.
Go buy about 2 or 3 26's (Quarts) of rum, and don't be afraid to mix it up like some malibu and shit.
Poor that shit in the cooler with the fruit.
Buy fruit juice - literally any fucking flavour, and add to the mix.
Let sit for about 24 hours prior to party.
End result: Amazing tasting punch and fruit infused with liquor.
I once made a bunch of super strong Jell-O shots and passed them out at a party. Everyone loved them and i was the coolest girl there. At least I think I was, I could have just been really drunk.
Taco 12 pack. Those commercials don't lie... If you walk into a party at the right time, with a taco twelve pack, your a fucking hero
If it's a pool party a greased watermelon.
I brought a sheet cake to a party once. I didn't know anyone there and I was a bit nervous. I wrote "Cake Mother Fucker!" On the cake in icing. It was the hit of the party and I met so many people! I was known as "Cake Mother Fucker" by people for a long time after...
The ability to mix/make an easy but delicious cocktail/mixer/drink. Girls love girly drinks, and well guys do too, they are just too manly to admit it.
Bring some solo cups too, so the guys who are concerned with how it looks for them to be drinking fruity drinks can camouflage their tropical deliciousness.
A flabongo, a beer funnel made from a lawn flamingo.
Shot glasses in two colors and a checkerboard. You jump it, they drink it. King me? They chug a beer.
Note: do NOT do this with Chinese Checkers. You will die.
A banana, always take a banana to a party.
Show up with two 40s duck taped to your hands
Lollipops. Someone asks for a cigarette, whip out a complimentary lollipop. Ask a girl if she needs something to suck on, and moments before the drink hits your face, gracefully present the lollipop. Somebody tries to pick a fight with you, neutralize the threat with lollipop diplomacy. Find a set of tiny drums, lollirock. And if the night sucks, shit, at least you have a lollipop.
If it's late in the night when you arrive, and you know there is enough booze, don't bring more booze. Bring 200 chicken nuggets.
I mean some green always helps the party
Three layer taco dip:
Ingredients: 1 container sour cream 1 container of cream cheese (or those square packages they come in) 1 package taco seasoning 1 jar of salsa (I usually buy the jumbo size because...salsa) 1 bag of pre-shredded tex-mex cheese. 1-3 bags of tortilla chips
In a pan, bowl, whatever holding implement you want to use, mix the cream cheese (leave it out at room temperature), sour cream and taco seasoning. Spread evenly on bottom. Pour the salsa on top of the sour cream/cream cheese mix. Be generous, people love salsa. Spread it evenly. On top of the entire mix, dump a happy helping of shredded cheese. Then add some more to ensure the party people will not riot due to lack of cheese. Put in fridge and leave for about an hour (just to make it cold and harden a bit). Take your tortilla chips. Dip them in the layered dip. Put entire thing in your mouth. Moan in absolute ecstasy.
I bring this dip to every party/drinking lazy fest I attend. It wins everytime. Why? Because it's amazing. And salsa. People love that shit.
Bartender here, just few tips off my mind. Fresh limes will drastically improve most drinks. It' often fun to blend together pop and juice to get the drink fizzy but colorful. Peach schapps mixes with almost anything, it's cheap, would definitely recommend. Sprite can pretty much make anything taste better. Ginger ale is my go to mix for anything... except for Jack Daniels. It can be tricky to mix with applejucice. It's often fun to have grenadine at your home bar, it makes some drinks look really good. Don't shake pops. Don't make Sex on the Beach, that drink is barely mediocre and outdated. It's amazing what small garnish can do to drinks at a party; berries, orange slices, orange peel, kiwi. Above all, keep it simple. Have fun.
TL/DR I'm a bartender, bring peach snapps, ginger ale, sprite, some juice fresh lime and easy garnish to a party. If you have to make a choice go for fresh lime
How about water? No one is saying water ! Source: professional drunker