So Apparently, We’ve Been Eating Chicken Wings All Wrong

Is there a right way to eat a chicken wing  like a boss?  I’m not asking about the drumstick — those summabitches you just gnaw on and lick until the meat is destroyed. I’m talking about those flat wings, the ones with tricky forearm bones that make eating them a mess.

Luckily, just like there’s a next-level way to eat an applecupcake and strawberry, there’s a way to eat chicken wings in one fell swoop.

It’s the height of football season, and every function I’m at seems to be serving wings. As a result, I’ve been trying to figure out the proper way to get the meat off the bone. I finally found the answer during a conversation with my friend Brandi Milloy (see her below) as we discussed the various eating situations we normally get into when tackling buffalo wings.

brand-messy-wings

Do I try that one trick where I try to suck the entirety of the meat off the bone?  Do I use a fork and knife? All of these ways seemed either tedious or over-ambitious — until she mentioned the de-boning method she uses on occasion. My jaw dropped.

Apparently, if you have a batch of properly cooked wings, you can turn pretty much any wing into a 100% edible nugget. Just find the end with the protruding cartilage and tear it off. Now, the bones should be a bit loose. Next, wiggle the smaller bone holding the opposite end firmly and it’ll pull out, void of any flesh. Then do the same for the remaining bone, until all you’re left with is 100% chicken wing meat.

brandi-big-bone-furreal

brandi-twist-small-bone



Elie is a product of Orange County, CA. In early 2012, his dentist diagnosed him with 8 different cavities, three of which on the same tooth, as a result of his 23-year Sour Patch Kid addiction.



  • Karyn Bijleveld

    so… How do you eat the kind with one big ol bone in em?

    • Anonymous

      Very, very carefully. ;)

  • Linda Lovelush

    I just eat the skin and flesh around the bone, as much as I can get off of there. Then I push my finger (from behind the wing) between the two bones, shoving the meat towards me, then eat it. I’ll have to try it this way next time to see if it’s any easier than the way I already eat them.

  • Matthew Jones Harper

    Whenever I’m at KFC I just eat the bones

  • Jonathan Vanderhuge Spear

    I always invite my vegan friends over, so there is more for me. That’s the way to eat chicken, with a heaping side of liberal tears.