24 Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle Pizza Orders IRL

shitty-pizza-drop

As a kid, I loved watching the ’90s Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles cartoons. Who didn’t? One of the things that stuck was all the ridiculous pizzas Michelangelo and his brothers would order throughout the series. As the years passed, I started to think some of those pizzas could actually be pretty delicious if done right. Though it did take a solid 22 years for anchovies to grow on me.

Like his Renaissance namesake, who would have thought Mikey was ahead of his time. Using some hunger-fueld imagination Foodbeast recreated 24 of the most disgusting pizza orders from the TV show and turned them into something you could order at a restaurant. Cowabunga.

__________

Tuna fish, peanut butter and grape jelly

IMG_8163

Tuna ahi poke on top of a bed of seaweed salad and drizzled some hot, melted peanut butter and grape jelly on top. Went more for color than taste. Ending up tasting great so that worked itself out.

IMG_8145

__________

Peanut butter and clams

IMG_8709

Drenched the pizza in a cajun peanut butter sauce with four fresh calms. The heat from the sauce really made the clams, no pun intended, pop. Crawfish for garnish.

IMG_8721

__________

Peanut butter, avocado and extra pickles

IMG_8704

A bed of guacamole topped with avocado slices, melted peanut butter and some sweet dill pickle chips. This is actually a sandwich I make on many an occasion.

IMG_8687

__________

Marshmallow and pepperoni

IMG_7194

Pepperoni and cheese pizza topped with roasted marshmallows. The marshmallows look like haunting little lifeboats on a sea of pepperoni.

IMG_7188

__________

Marshmallow and asparagus

IMG_8877

Asparagus and cheese baked directly into the crust and topped with toasted mini marshmallows. Had to many different versions of this one before I settled on this. Couldn’t be happier.

IMG_8889

__________

Guacamole and Marshmallow

IMG_8663

A generous heap of freshly made guacamole and topped with a single marshmallow lit on fire. Kids, don’t try this at home. Grownups, go nuts.

IMG_8640

__________

Butterscotch, onions and anchovies

IMG_8479

Onion and anchovies caramelized in brown sugar and a butterscotch sauce. Tasted great but stunk up my kitchen like nobody’s business. Do turtles have nostrils?

IMG_8484

__________

Tea and toast

IMG_8866

A buttered slice of toast on top of tomato sauce and sprinkled with tea leaves, parmesan cheese and more tomato sauce. The original concept for this had chunks of toast drenched in tea. NOT. APPETIZING.

IMG_8864

__________

Chocolate sprinkles and clam sauce

IMG_8284

A cheese pizza made with a hearty clam sauce and chocolate sprinkles and garnished with green onions. Not easy to make clam sauce pop on a pizza. Had to tweak it into a chowder. Master Splinter would be proud.

IMG_8250

__________

Chocolate-chip

IMG_8898

Chocolate chips baked into the pizza and drenched with a generous amount of hot fudge. It’s essentially a cookie.

IMG_8928

__________

Chocolate fudge with extra garlic

IMG_8617

A generous amount of fried garlic on top of a pool of melted chocolate fudge. Definitely not something you’d order on a first date, but then again, are any of these pizzas?

IMG_8621

__________

Chocolate fudge, sardine, chili pepper, whipped cream

IMG_8825

A cheese and whipped cream pizza topped with shaved chocolate fudge and red chili flakes. Served with a fried sardine filet in chocolate fudge sauce. Any nutrients that piece of sardine contains is neutralized by that mountain of whipped cream. I guarantee it.

IMG_8835

__________

Anchovies and hot fudge

IMG_8548

Hot chocolate fudge drizzled over anchovy filets on a sauceless white pizza. Until the day anchovies turn into giant mutated fish that eat people, they’ll forever be my favorite fish.

IMG_8562

__________

Pepperoni and hot fudge

IMG_8219

A classic pepperoni and cheese pizza drizzled with a little chocolate fudge. Just a little. We’re not animals.

IMG_8225

___________

Pepperoni and pickles

IMG_8297

Cheese and pepperoni pizza with sweet dill pickle chips. The pickles add a crunch that can be heard all through the New York sewer systems.

IMG_8293

__________

Jelly bean and sausage

IMG_8514

A spicy pork chorizo and sour cream pizza topped with queso fresco and fresh cilantro and served with a jalapeño jellybean gastrique. The jelly beans had us stumped but luckily Reddit came to the rescue.

IMG_8533

__________

Salami pizza with double yogurt

IMG_8371

Two servings of vanilla yogurt topped with fresh salami slices and drizzled with blackberry jelly. If you can get over the idea of salami and yogurt, it goes down pretty tastily.

IMG_8388

__________

Shredded coconut and sweet pickles

IMG_8358

Pizza is topped with shredded coconut, drizzled with hot mustard and topped with sweet pickle chips. Shredder would be a crazy handy guy to have in this situation.

IMG_8357

__________

Strawberry with anchovy sauce

IMG_8781

Caramelized strawberries served with an anchovy butter sauce and topped with whipped cream. This one was the most difficult to come up with. Thankfully, whipped cream saved the day.

IMG_8782

__________

Hot oatmeal

IMG_8308

Hot, buttery oatmeal topped with brown sugar, honey and fresh strawberries. It’s another side to breakfast pizza.

IMG_8314

__________

Popcorn

IMG_6678

Truffle oil popcorn with parsley flakes and parmesan cheese. There’s a pizza somewhere under that mountain of popcorn.

IMG_6662

__________

Anchovies and banana

IMG_6656

Caramelized rum bananas and anchovy filets. The pizza that inspired this post. The bananas and anchovies were the perfect balance of sweet and salty.

IMG_6651

 

__________

Goulash

IMG_8598

Hot goulash served with crumbles of queso fresco. After a quick Google search of what exactly goulash was, it was pretty easy to make.

IMG_8595

__________

Granola and licorice 

IMG_8422

Vanilla yogurt topped with granola and shaved red licorice. It was a bitch to hand shred licorice, but doesn’t it look pretty?

IMG_8413

___________

Video for verification



Pete is a guy who enjoys comics, cartoons and crappy movies. Favorite foods include pizza, mexican and pretty much anything that has to do with breakfast. If the three were combined, it would be preferred. His browser history is filled with food porn.



In this article:

Around the Web



VIDEO