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Sriracha Lip Balm Could Have Disastrous Consequences

Without the proper lip care, eating spicy foods in winter can be a very dangerous undertaking. All it takes is absent-mindedly going out to your favorite Cajun seafood house, ordering a pound of spicy, lemony, garlicky crawfish and going in for a bite when sssssssshhhiii---hottttttt! Suddenly your dry, cracked lips are almost literally on fire and no amount of napkin-wiping or water-drinking is going to put them out.

But be warned: if you use this Sriracha Lip Balm from J&D, it could be a million times worse.

Not only will you have to work up the courage to bring something that smells so much like that iconic chili sauce close to your mouth again (remember what happened last time?), but you could end up liking it so much you forget Sriracha’s normal form is actually extremely bad for your lips.

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Imagine, one day you’ll get so used to Sriracha as lip salve that when you happen to run out or lose your stick while eating at a Vietnamese restaurant (it happens), you’ll be all, “Chill, it’s all good. I’ve got all the balm I need right here.” And it won’t be until you’ve fully moistened your choppers with that gorgeous red rooster sauce that you remember, no, Sriracha is not your friend during winter when your lips are incredibly dry.

Oh, but it hurts so good.

Sriracha Lip Balm, SPF 15: $4 @ J&D’s