Slide Whistle Straws Let You Drink Like a Cartoon Character

slide-whistle-straw-1

There’s an old episode of Spongebob Squarepants in which Spongebob, Patrick, and Squidward get their hands on some slide whistles and proceed to add inappropriate sound effects to EVERYTHING in Bikini Bottom — from automatic doors opening to lover’s quarrels. While we don’t recommend being that insufferable, these “Wet My Whistle” straws from Fred & Friends could add some much needed entertainment to an otherwise joyless drinking experience.

Slide whistle when your buddy gets turned down by a girl at the bar. Slide whistle to cover unpleasant vomiting sounds. Slide whistle just to slide whistle, because you and your friends are drunk and no one will remember how annoying you’re being anyway. The “slide” works by pulling the straw in and out of liquid as you blow, providing the perfect excuse to keep drinking — or the perfect excuse for the bartender to cut you off early.

slide-whistle-straw-2

Wet My Whistle Musical Straws, available soon for $9.99 @Fred & Friends

H/T Incredible Things

More content

CultureProducts
This Avengers Nano Gauntlet Is Hiding Something Behind The Infinity Stones
In the Avengers’ fight to save the galaxy from Thanos, one harebrained scheme hatched by the team’s resident geniuses involved creating a faux Infinity Gauntlet…
,
Products
Folgers Is Going All In On Protein And Functional Coffee
The protein-ification of everything continues, and now your morning coffee is getting involved. Folgers is launching a new line of functional coffees led by Folgers…
,
CultureProducts
Andy Reid Has Been Serving His Teams A Pregame ‘Cheeseburger Snack’ For Years
Andy Reid’s love of cheeseburgers has become nearly as synonymous with the coach as football itself. He uses them as metaphors, promises them to players,…
,
Burger
We Deliver!

Enter your email address below and we'll deliver our top stories straight to your inbox