Why does losing weight have to suck so much? Why does exercise have to hurt and steak have to taste like heaven’s leftovers?
A new weight-loss spray out of Britain isn’t going to make things any better. It’s called the “Stink Yourself Slim,” and inventor Alex Fontaine came up with the idea after she had her lunch ruined by the presence of a stray skunk. The idea, in case you can’t put two and two together, is that by dousing your delicious Monkey-style In-N-Out burger in skunk-funk, you’ll be so turned off that you remember to reach for the salad instead.
Except of course, if I have enough willpower to reach for the spray in the first place, shouldn’t I also know just to not order the burger?
Other equally-reasonable applications include: skunk-bombing the competition down the street to drive business to your own restaurant, giving yourself a five-seat buffer in a crowded movie theatre, and blackmailing your way to better Halloween candy loot.