Apparently, today is Christmas for Starbucks fans. Again. The company is rolling out a plethora of new items and services in the US today that might just change the way you start your day.

The Caramel Flan Latte has returned and it brought a few friends with it. I'm sure your doctor won't mind if you grab a chocolate caramel muffin with a Tiramisu Latte or a bacon, egg and cheddar breakfast sandwich (OK, they'll definitely mind). Luckily for your health, the sandwich is the only permanent addition, while the rest are seasonal.

For those of you concerned with your health, coconut milk is officially available as an alternative to dairy and soy. The substitution, an odd addition ahead of the obvious almond milk, lowers the calorie count of any drink, but leaves a sweet aftertaste.

Most importantly, Starbucks launched a coffee subscription service in an attempt to compete with rising roasters like Stumptown and Intelligentsia. The Starbucks Reserve Roastery subscriptions cost $24 a month and bring small-batch Reserve coffees to your door within 48 hours of roasting.

Basically, Starbucks is trying to woo the wallets off of customers right now, and they're doing so in full evil genius fashion. They are distracting their complacent base with new menu items, while appealing to sideline hipsters with their Reserve expansion and health-conscious caffeine lovers with coconut milk.

I'm on to you, Starbucks.

*Sips Caramel Flan Latte*